I had a dream once when I was in secondary two. A lady wearing green Baju Kurung emerged in my dream. She had curly hair. She spoke. She said to be thankful for what I have because one day soon, everything I have will disappear. She said "soon your luck will run out." I keep her words close. I was afraid but at the same time everytime my life turned out fine, I can't describe how thankful I am. Every day my family is healthy is a huge blessing to me.
There were many lessons I learnt along the way and many, I am glad I learnt early in my life. One of it was to save for what I wanted. I wasn't born in a family who could give me everything I need. I'm sure my parents would if they could, but they didn't have enough. I bought my first bicycle when I was in primary school with my own money from Hari Raya visiting. Many times I was tempted to spend it on little things but I told myself I wanted that bicycle so bad.
My next big purchase was a laptop. I had started NIE but I didn't have enough to buy it. I needed it for school assignments. So I decided to purchase it at courts and pay installments instead. I soon realized somehow I just cannot finish paying. After about 2 years my laptop was spoilt and yet I was still paying for it! The price became 3x more since I paid by installments instead of cash. The moment I managed to pay off the last dollar, I was soooo relieved!
I vowed to never purchase anything using installments ever again! And I never did till today.
And then I started working. I got my first and only credit card a year or 2 after I started working. Using it was so simple I just couldn't believe it. I don't remember what I bought with it but somehow I could never finish paying if I pay the minimum sum each month. It kept dragging and dragging. At times I paid late and interests was incurred. My credit card amounted to thousands and I can never seem to get it to any lesser. I finally removed my credit card from my wallet , and concentrated on settling the amount that I had already incurred before touching my card ever again. It took years for me to pay off everything. Most of my monthly pay went to paying off the credit card. And boy the sense of relief when I finished paying was unbelievable!! After that I cut my credit card into 2 and never had a credit card again eversince! To me, that was the most important lesson I learnt early in my life.
So when I needed to save for my wedding, I knew credit card was not an option. So I just had to be disciplined and kept aside money monthly. I am not naturally a thrifty person so it was a lot of effort on my part to forgo the things I wanted. To be honest when I could not purchase the things I wanted because I had to save, I was pretty bitter and sore and blamed my parents for their poor financial planning as they could not even pay for their youngest daughter's wedding. But those were insane moments. The truth is, I've always understood that my parents had given us all that they could. Given the fact that they were uneducated, their life has been filled with so many blessings. They managed to give us a comfortable home, education and so much love.
And to me, my degree was also a miracle
because I was neither bright not hardworking. And so I feel like it's put on my lap for a greater purpose. To help my parents, to ease them a little. And to pay for what they couldn't, including my wedding. And so my insane moments of bitterness were but a fleeting moment.
Those were some of the many lessons I have learnt in my life. There are many more. Save that for another day.
