Depressed mode on. Generally, it has been a bad week:(
And I let them in, the thoughts, the doubts and the assumptions. If only I can love the stormy days as much as I love the stormy nites. The difference is I never let the rain in; just enjoyed the cold and the sound of rain pouring outside while snugly sheltered in the comforts of a cozy room, with good company and Maggie.
I need to be sheltered the same way, to let it pour like mad outside and never let them
Into my comfy cocoon. It's just a job. But the rain keeps coming in and I cannot just let it pour outside.:( I can't and I'm totally drenched waiting to get out from the cold. After a while I'm freezing with no where to go and my own mind to convince. The rain is not in my mind and in the same way, I can't make it sunny in my mind. My mind is not god and as much as I believe in self fulfilling prophecy, my mind is limited in so many ways.
I'm doubtful, I'm always doubtful.


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