My loves

They are super excited to have another member join them create more ruckus at home!

One more month to my EDD and I'm hoping everything will go well. Insyaallah. Super excited but very nervous too!

Bye bye birdie:)

He was all smiles and in high spirits on the way to the doc. In tow was his loyal supporter, who was more afraid of the whole ordeal than her brother was. She already told us right from the start that she wanted to follow him to the doc but would not be going into the doc's room.

The boy and her loyal supporter

The boy, on the other hand, didn't quite know what kind of pain he was going to go through. So he was smiling right up to when he was lying on the small 'operating bed' with the lights shining down on him. Right up to when the doc lifted his jubah n swiped his birdie with some cold swab of cotton wool. He was still smiling.

In high spirits, waiting for his turn at the clinic!:) So kesian.

After which, I left the room coz only one person was allowed in and I decided to leave it to the daddy to reminisce his 'bye bye birdie' experience many many years ago.

And then, from outside, I heard the cries. (Irfan's cries, not the daddy's, in case you are wondering:) And my heart felt like breaking. I would have cried too if I had 3 injections down there and then have someone snip it off. Ewww.. Just the thought of it made me weak in the knees.

Barely 15 mins later, he came out in tears. My breaking heart broke into pieces. In between tears, he said,"It was veryyy painful." I think he didn't expect that it will be THAT painful! I gave him a hug and told him how brave he was. I remembered how he was smiling just a few minutes ago...so kesian.

On the way home. Tears on his face.

At home, the ordeal wasn't over for him. His first few pee was excruciatingly painful. Alim was more patient, coz he probably knew how painful it was. On his first pee, the boy said, "I don't want to sunat ever again!" Yes boy, we will grant you that wish. Promise!

Day 1: My dad put the old skool wire in his jubah to prevent his birdie from touching the jubah.
Reminded me of my brothers' circumcision years years ago.
Smiles all gone!:(:(

Day 2: Mak Long, Pak Long and Qistina gave him a Nerf gun for his fly away birdie.
Now he's smiling!!

It's his third day today and he is healing well. He's playing, walking but once in a while, he still fear peeing and passing motion. The ring will probably drop off in a few days. Inshallah, he will heal quickly and get back to his normal self!

Day 3: Wire's off and play time!

Come near my birdie again and I'll SHOOT!

You've been a brave boy, Irfan. We are all proud of you!

Happy Father's Day Papi!!

Have we told you lately how awesome you are? Happy Father's Day Papi!!
You are our Super Daddy!

9th of June; Happy Birthday, partner!

On the 9th of June, was the birthday of a special person, a partner who was destined to walk the rest of my life with me.

He has been there with me, for me, every step of the way, always giving nothing less than his all, the millions of sacrifices he has made for me, the children and my family, living under the same roof as my parents and respecting and appreciating them more than I am capable of sometimes.

I can never thank him enough. I can never match his birthday celebration with the kind of person he is.

My children are lucky to have him as a daddy. And me, I'm just lucky he loves me.

So happy birthday, my dear partner. May Allah bless you with good health always and unwavering patience. May the children inherit your kind, kind heart and selfless nature.

We love you more than you love us.
Always:)

Kids prepared a surprise birthday breakfast in bed for their daddy. Irfan
and Alisha made French toast for him and strawberries with chocolate Hershey's toppings at the side. With a glass of milk and a tray to put everything on, they served their daddy in bed. Sweet!

We decided to stay at rasa sentosa for the night. It has become a favorite staycation whenever I'm pregnant. Realized that we did this for all the 3 kids while I was pregnant. The kids love the pool and the beach! And the birthday boy was given a surprise birthday cake which was on the house. Yeah!

This time, we also brought them to Underwater World and listened to a storytelling session which was happening while they were there followed by a short craftwork.

Enjoy some of the pics, taken from my phone.

Alhamdullilah for these good times. :)

Old and grey.. Will u love me anyway?

Dear Irfan and Alisha,

Everyday I pray that when I am old and grey, I will not be of too much trouble to the both of you.

When it comes to health, I'm sorry but I really don't have any control. I don't know how my old age will be, and if I'll somehow become very ill and if you do decide to take care of me n love me, I will like to apologise in advance for being difficult and being an added responsibility to you.

But if health permits and i still stay relatively healthy and strong when I'm much older, one thing i will make sure is that I am financially independent.

Of course, I can only try and no one knows what the future brings, but I will work my ass of now to make sure I don't have to be financially dependent on the both of you when im old. I think that's what responsible parents should do.

You have your own lives to build, your own challenges and struggles raising a family of your own so I really do not want to add on to your responsibilities.

I know you will be wonderful children who will want to live up to your responsibilities to take care of me when the need arises, and knowing that about the two of you, I hope I will never have to put you in a situation where you will have to take on that responsibility.

I know you will do anything for me, (I hope) but I really don't have the heart to see you struggle (emotionally) because of me.

I will remember not to spend every single cent of my money on the here and now and not think about my old age, or just "tawakkal" that my life will be taken care of. That is indeed irresponsible because ultimately which good child will stand around seeing their parents in difficulty? I'm sure you will try your best to help me but I also know that you will be struggling with your own lives.

I hope I will never have to demand money from you because I know it will sap away every ounce of sincerity you have and makes you re evaluate your noble intentions of making me happy. I hope if you do have spare cash and decide to give me, it's because you love me, you feel good about it and not because you have to.

And I will try my darnest not to demand money from you just because I think you can afford to give them to me.

And more importantly,I will try my best never to think that getting money from u monthly is my RIGHT.

No matter how much you earn.

My dear babies, I don't know how my old age will be.
and that is why I wrote "I will try" instead of "I will". I don't want to be too cocky and say I will NEVER be that kind of parents. Because honestly, The future is not in our hands and circumstances sometimes forces us to do otherwise.

But I pray I won't be of too much trouble to the both of you.

I can't promise but I do what I can now, when I am healthy and strong. I'll save some for my old age, I will try my best. But ultimately HE decides. I dont know how i will feel when im old. I dont know what my thoughts are.

I am not a perfect parent and I learn as I go along. Learning can be a painful process but I try to take it positively (though not always successful) and these uncomfortable experiences help me anticipate what lies ahead and gives me a better idea of how my babies will feel in the future if I behave in a certain way. So yes, although painful, it's not a lost cause.

But Whatever the future holds, my dear babies, I hope you will love me no less when I'm old.

I hope I will never ever make you feel like you are lousy children who can never make their parents happy.

I know how sad that feeling is.
I'm sorry if I do.

Love and kisses,
Your mummy forever

A Pink Party!!

So, a PINK party was inevitable.
You've guessed it. She wanted pink! She wanted princesses!
Ok, so I relented coz it's her birthday afterall and being surrounded by things she love and people she adore would make any birthday celebration a great one.

Other than pink and princesses, there's one other thing Alisha loves. Watching this video over and over again. It's a video on how to make a castle cake! Oh she simply loves it. Watch it!

So we simply put all the things she love in her birthday celebration:)
For someone who loves the video above, what could be more exciting than decorating her very own castle cake for her own birthday, right?!

PINK overdose

Excited to start!

We shall begin! Making our very own castle cake, inspired by Howdini.com. Excited much!

So instead of getting a ready made cake, we thought we would do something different this year.
We ordered a sponge cake and ready made frosting.
We then frosted it ourselves and decorated it, just like her favourite video! Busy at work.

Look at the frosted cake. The video made it look so easy but ours was not so neat. 

Alisha's dream came true when she used the spatula to frost the cake, just like in the video. Haha!

Nenek had to leave for a wedding, so we paused and took a picture with the unfinished cake.

And then the fun continues!
These four CHILDREN very excited hor. Next up; preparing the castle towers!

Frosting the ice cream cone for the castle towers!

Rolling the glitter, just like in the video. 

Full of concentration hor! But tiara must maintain ok.

Muka ada senyum! The princess seems very happy with her castle cake so far!

We can't make it as nice as the experts so we turned it into our own!:)

The castle looked like it could topple anytime, leaning more and more to one side. HAHAHA!

Senget pun sengetlah!

We added wafers, stars and sprinkles. 

The princess and her favourite princess cousin!

We added some cute tiara candles and a few more sweets and TADAA!! Our very own leaning tower castle!!! 

Princess looks very happy ah. Luckily it didn' topple!!

The princess and the smart wizard she hangs out with everyday in her castle.
The wizard has all kinds of trickery under his belt to make her happy;)

The princess and her Royal Family:)

The rest of the princesses wannabe. 

I believe strongly that a pink overdose can make people go crazy.

With the people she love;)

Finally the castle was lighted and we sang her the birthday song!;)

It still didn't topple! Phew!

And lastly, with her dear brother.

Although the party was obviously all girly and pink, he didnt mind one bit helping his sister complete the cake.

We hope you had a blast, little girl.

You'll always be our little princess, no matter how much you have grown.

We love you so much!

Always:)

Fly me there, fly me far

And the holiday begins tomorrow.. I'm itching to go somewhere, far, far away where there's vast greenery, colorful flowers,stretches of emptiness,
calm lakes, beautiful blue skies, even made more beautiful by curvatures of mountains, old, medieval buildings of some sort.

Can you imagine that place like I do?

It always starts with a picture in my head. And I have this picture in my mind. I just got to be there.

But alas, I can't travel. The plane will not have me. My gynae advised against it.

It's like a bad habit or an addiction you can't kick. It feels like a wasted June if I don't use it to go pursue that picture in my head.

But oh well, I don't really have a choice. Upside? I've got to save all that money. :)

And I'm sure the quality time spent with the kids before the new addition will be something I treasure, no matter where we are:)

(trying my best to make myself feel better here, but i must say, it's not working much:(

You put your arms around me, and I'm home

Woohoo! The surprise tickets were really a surprise!!! Thank you Mr ALim! Muaaacks!!!!

Christina Perri, can't wait to see you on the 8th of June!:)

love you more than you love me

Irfan's conversation with his daddy on whatsapp. Alim was telling him about boom netting which he and his students did during the day.

Sweetest last line from Irfan:) Dah macam love birds!

Irfan, dont forget to continue saying all the sweet stuff to your mummy and daddy when we are old, slow, hard of hearing, sensitive and senile k! It will always be music to our ears. Except maybe you'll just have to say it LOUDER then;)

A hug

Feeling angsty, tired and depressed. :( alim is away bringing his students to bintan. I told the kids I missed his daddy.

Immediately, both of them came to me at the same time and gave me a tight big hug! Irfan said,"You have us"

Awwww, sweet. Yes I do, and I'm forever thankful.

What goes around comes around

Maybe it's the hormones but I've been getting easily irritated these days.

There's just some things that I can't stand these days.

These days im so irritated by people whom i think are taking advantage of me. I can seem to be blur, quite easygoing, calm, quiet and don't flare up easily and I hate people who take advantage of that!

I have my own set of beliefs but I'm not the sort who impose my views on others. If I say it once and you don't agree, then I would say "sukati Kau lah". Yes i make a lousy saleswoman. I do.

They might think I don't mind or don't get it, but I do mind and I'm seriously pissed off. I wish I can tell it to their faces but I shall not stoop that low. And I hate getting into an argument. I don't have time for that.

So they might think they've got the better of me. Oh well, I shall let it pass because im not in a position to give them what they deserve. Only HE knows best. So I shall save my time and my breath and let them have what they want. Honestly it's no loss on my part but their gain, if not deserving will be plain toxic!

What goes around comes around, baby!

Birthday high

She's still playing with her balloon at 12 midnight! She has never slept this late. She's still so hyper and jiggling her butt away dancing on the bed with her balloon.

Oh my, she's on a birthday high!

We had a mini celebration just now, a princess cake from swensens and alims parents dropped by. She was über excited and very happy, you should see!

Still on a high now and we've switched off all the lights but we can still hear her voice yakking away! Sleep la, girl.. We give chance k, today is your birthday but hope you can wake up for sch tomorrow!

Omg, shes still yakking... I think I give up. I'm going to bed now.

Happy 3rd Birthday brown bear!!

Happy Birthday to our little brown bear. Your birthday is finally here!!!

May you grow up healthy and happy, and your path be filled with countless blessings, Alisha. You will never know how much your presence has brighten up our lives! We love u to bits, always and forever.

In my arms

3 years ago, today, on the 8th of may, I started feeling strong contractions and we made our way to K.K exactly around this time (it's 9.36pm now).

At 12.15 midnight, after much huffing and puffing, my baby girl was born and I held her in my arms:)

And now, 3 years on, she's lying in my arms, beside me excitedly counting the hours to her birthday!

We love you! Looking forward to sat!!

A fresh new start

I'm in the mood for blue, light green and especially turquoise and white, I have no idea why! I love going into Zara these days because of the white and turquoise collection. I didn't buy any turquoise top though because it's probably not a good time to shop when you are pregnant especially when I am thinking of wearing them post pregnancy. But I lurrvvvve the turquoise soo much!

But I did buy those irresistible turquoise tops and bottoms for Alisha! They are so pretty, I had a hard time choosing and deciding on which one. The Zara at Lane Crawford (is it still called Lane Crawford now?) had a wide collection of kids' clothes that I almost went berserk, and most of them were in turquoise and white!

If I had a baby room, I would probably decorate the whole room in turquoise and white too!!

And so I decided to change my blog layout. For now, Im shelving the black and grey and welcoming in the fresh white and blue! I would love to have turquoise on my blog but I can't really find a matching picture. Hmm, maybe I should have bought a turquoise top, just so I can take a pic and put it up as a banner in my blog. Hah. But that would be too much, wouldnt it?

I'm lurving the fresh look and the calming blue of my layout. But the downside is, everytime I look at it, I'm wishing I'm in Santorini all over again. I've asked my gynae if I could travel in June but she told me, most airlines won't probably let the big whale on board, for fear of drama and by June, I would have crossed that 34 weeks mark. So sad, that would mean, no travelling for us. :(

I probably won't be that big in June and I think I have not gained so much weight. Maybe no one would know I'm into my 3rd trimester and would just let me pass through? You think? There's always hope!

Anyway, have a great off in lieu today, for some of us! Back to work tomorrow! :)

Happy times

No one will love you more than I do.

Atok atok

While waiting for our turn to meet dr georgie. Can you tell that she spends a lot of time hanging out with her Atok?

2 more months to labour!!!! Omg the memories are now coming back and it doesn't matter that this the third; I'm feeling the jitters all the same!!!

Laundry Day

No one escapes housework..
Oh well, except for the pregnant lady of course!:)
Muahahaha!!!!

Oh but fret not, she sent her capable representative to help.
Rajin anak mak...sebiji macam MAK dia!

27 weeks

At 27 weeks! Not much weight gain this time round.
Hello final trimester next week!:)